Peer pressure is always difficult to deal with, especially when it comes to sex. Many girls feel the pressure from friends to have sex before they’re ready, which is why it’s so important to have the confidence to say no to something you don’t feel ready to do.
Just because your friends are having sex – or say they’re having sex –doesn’t mean that you have to as well! You might feel like everyone is ‘doing it’, but you will soon realise that this is not the case. Your friends may talk about sex in a casual manner. If you have a good group of friends, they should not be pressuring you into doing something that you’re not ready to do.
Pressure from magazines, celebrities and peers can all contribute to the pressure that you may feel. On TV, sex is displayed in such a casual way, however you should remember that sex is actually a really big deal! You need to make sure that you’re completely confident and comfortable with your decision if you do decide to have sex. Think carefully how you feel yourself about having sex, as this is the first step in handling the peer pressure. It’s okay to have fun when you’re a teenager, but equally you need to respect yourself enough to say ‘no I’m not ready’ and your peers should respect that too. When making the decision to have sex, consider whether peer pressure is influencing your decision or if it’s something that you have decided that you are ready to do. Once you’ve had sex for the first time you can’t go back, so make sure it’s a decision that you won’t regret.
Remember that there is no certain age that you are expected to have sex – a lot of people wait until they’re married! Everybody is different and will mature and feel ready at different ages, so just because your friend is doing it and feels ready now, this does not mean that you should feel that way too. Don’t ever have sex just to fit in with your friends, as they will respect you more if you stick to your morals and don’t do things just because you’re pressured to.
If you’re worried about peer pressure, know that you’re not alone. Hang out with friends who understand you and also believe that it’s okay to wait to have sex. If you’re going on a first date, go along with friends so it’s not just you and your date. This way, if you feel worried that you might be pressured into doing something you don’t want to, you won’t be alone. Think of what you would say in advance if anyone tries to pressure you in the future, so that you’re not caught off guard or feel like you have to do something you don’t want to. You are never obliged to have sex with someone, so even if they try to make you feel guilty never do something that you don’t want to do, as it’s always your decision. Sex is not something that you should rush into, so take your time until you feel 100% ready to take the next step. Respect yourself, your morals and your body and when the time is right to take the next step, you will know.